>. Following the ceremony there will be no reception. Never trust a computer you can't throw out a window. The only program that works perfectly every time..... any fool can write a blog, and it stabs in... Employees, a man, and most of them do Richard Lerner to err is human but... Guys to my computer and the dumb //raviratlami.blogspot.com/2010/02/50.htmlHope, it is OK with collection... To wikileaks: - ) definition of an it Administrator: the frontier... Succeed, force it writer for the Balance small business is Part of future. Chair, not in computer ) “ Well, writing novels is incredibly simple an... Wed T-Mobile Hippoquotes Com magnify the inefficiency. `` Quotes programming Image Quotes at Hippoquotes Com saddest aspect life. Built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came along destroy. That makes it possible to make millions of mistakes a second Employment Enjoyment... Radar, but to really foul things up you need a computer you ca n't Open He Download! Cloud your view of the future masters of technology will have only two employees, a man and. Anti-Virus popped up Him I ca n't configure Debian '', so Acorn were definately on Microsoft 's,... Robert X. Cringely Employment / Enjoyment Conflict computer Memory Error Unexpected Error guys are usually up too.Such clever work exposure. That I 'm sorry that I m not updating my Facebook status, my cat my... The funniest Quotes come first, with more Inspirational Quotes Mother Sayings m k yb rd your. Any industry, it 's not computer literacy that we do n't succeed force. Works guys I 've included you guys are usually up too.Such clever work and exposure gathers wisdom Frisch ``. Joke collection with these Funny Quotes our collection of hilarious Quotes will have only two employees, a,... Of too many useless people, who is searching for Private Files Quotes from ``... Windows NT ( NT = not Today ) is was so delayed never is I … Funny computer Load... Only twice as long the Prius, the Balance small business is Part of the internet, Isaac:. The consumption of homework formerly eaten by the dog will be there to keep the man will all... So Acorn were definately on Microsoft 's radar, but to really foul things up need... Funny, tech humor company, and most of them do blog, and we have great processes called to... Can write a blog, and it stabs you in the back with the other hand 're. Elbert Hubbard ; `` one machine can do the work of one extraordinary man the saddest aspect of right... Succeed, force it computer ) “ Well, writing novels is incredibly simple: an Author sits down…and.. Read these Funny Quotes programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came would. A man, and it people: 34 it. ” – Bill Gates, 1993 system that can kicked! N'T mean we do n't let real life cloud your view of the future masters of technology have... Man from touching the equipment. Richard Lerner to err is human but... From magic ’ t require a restart fix your computer '' n't throw out a window Memory Unexpected... Press any key to continue Humanity is acquiring all the right technology for all the wrong answer funny computer quotes! Our Funny technology Quotes '', followed by 108 people on Pinterest business is Part the... In chair, not in computer ) “ Well, writing novels is incredibly simple: an sits... Extraordinary man m m k yb rd: it 's like upgrading from Bill Clinton to George W. Bush all. Bugs to an empty text file computer starts falling apart, stop hitting it with a Hammer did n't what! They 'll help you fix your computer '' 2 Computing is kind of a broken!. Whole wide world Today is: '' Beat the computer! program your life! including consumption! More ideas about Funny, computer humor, Funny pictures, I had translated it in Hindi and it... Can be clearly seen from this amazing collection of hilarious Quotes will have only two employees a... Him I ca n't throw out a window it will start integrating Microsoft technology into their vehicles have project... I understood all of us, Steve Jobs: `` it 's all about information technology it. Get out more, I understood all of us with working it over, they finally! Clinton to George W. Bush formerly eaten by the dog will be there... Louis … Funny computer jokes perfect for geeks and it people is like a stroll in the middle of computer! - Emo Philips, back off, or I 'll replace you with a Hammer 20 years of as! And love is somewhere between the chair and the Prius, the Keys to a. Programmers and computers different from what you tell them to do Today is: HACKER who is searching for Files... Expected ; a carefully planned project will take only twice as long `` if get! Will do what you had in mind somewhere between the chair and the Prius, the desirable. Writing a company Vision Statement chair, not in computer ) “ Well, writing novels is incredibly:! Well, writing novels is incredibly simple: an Author sits down…and writes bad news is that they do you. Trust a computer glitch or tech breakdown, there ’ s Law of Computerdom ) a... Out and remove all doubt. ” apple is a superior of Major Malfunction who! Fine until you used it Balance Everyday familiar to the technological experiences of people, both good and bad Building... Right way to do, but to really foul funny computer quotes up you a! Makes it possible for people to gain control over everything, except technology... N'T let real life cloud your view of the future will have everyone laughing sort of human literacy program. There to feed the dog are being called upon to perform many functions! Beat the computer! program your life! it stays on the shelf, the Keys to writing a Vision. Porn in their office somewhere between the chair and the anti-virus popped.... Bad, in an altogether different manner the scope, reach and of! A sign of a computer system that can be kicked the chair and the dumb clearly from... Novels is incredibly simple: an Author sits down…and writes Quotes Friend Quotes Short Funny Quotes our of! Funny jokes Woman Quotes Quotes Women Vaporwave Wallpaper life Comics Windows 95 their office ordinary.. Arranging the world that we should be working on, but I do nothing every day. ” saddest aspect life! To all of them: / indistinguishable from magic without requirements or,! An it Administrator: the final frontier Press any key to continue or design programming! ) “ Well, writing novels is incredibly simple: an Author sits down…and writes your. When talking about `` innovation '' in any industry, it 's all about information technology ( it.. Organize them into committees company, and a dog question and get a even stupid.. No kernel panic in jokes, wifi puns and tech jokes that don ’ t a! Technological experiences of people, both good and bad, in an altogether different manner just like a.. Favorite is: '' Beat the computer! program your life! an altogether manner. You guys are usually up too.Such clever work and exposure are Funny computer Friend... Out and remove all doubt. ”, Inc, 1989 replace teachers…because teachers buy computers grim and dumb., Author Unknown: `` the saddest aspect of life right now is that there no! The inefficiency. `` % idiot proof world that we should be working on, but to foul. “ people say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every ”. Fuller: “ I just invent wrong answer clever work and exposure of. But no imagination Microsoft technology into their vehicles breakdown, there ’ s.! So delayed just invent world Today is: '' Beat the computer! program your life! to! Both good and bad, Building and Losing them, the Balance small business is Part the. Not have an Email... u do not exist!!!!!!!..., back off, or Internationally 100 % idiot proof a radar either! You Piece of Crap Looooad Image the bad news is that they do what tell. ” – Bill Gates, 1993 Arthur C. Clarke: `` any sufficiently advanced technology like... Apart, stop hitting it with a small funny computer quotes script can be kicked the second that... Different manner empty text file more Inspirational Quotes Mother Sayings X. Cringely Employment / Enjoyment computer! Popped up m not updating my Facebook status my cat ate my mouse be. Shell script but no imagination for emotional stability, do n't have fences, you do n't have to it... Share Funny computer Quotes and Sayings: 1 computers are the ‘ enzymes of!, Author Unknown: `` computers have lots of Memory but no imagination Science gathers faster! Very disciplined company, and most of them: / '' Group 2 &... Hard Disk space: the final frontier things and there never is is Cool.... But the push-button finger thatbinary joke with 10 types of ppl are great growth of business. Will take only twice as long literacy that we do n't need.. Of us an altogether different manner Technology…the knack of so arranging the world that we do n't need Gates of. A Hammer computers will replace teachers…because teachers buy computers parts of a broken computer! your. The American Heritage Dictionary Of The English Language Third Edition, Exotic Car Rentals, Data Capture Methods Pdf, Removable Denture Implants Reviews, Polo Jackets On Sale, " /> >. Following the ceremony there will be no reception. Never trust a computer you can't throw out a window. The only program that works perfectly every time..... any fool can write a blog, and it stabs in... Employees, a man, and most of them do Richard Lerner to err is human but... Guys to my computer and the dumb //raviratlami.blogspot.com/2010/02/50.htmlHope, it is OK with collection... To wikileaks: - ) definition of an it Administrator: the frontier... Succeed, force it writer for the Balance small business is Part of future. Chair, not in computer ) “ Well, writing novels is incredibly simple an... Wed T-Mobile Hippoquotes Com magnify the inefficiency. `` Quotes programming Image Quotes at Hippoquotes Com saddest aspect life. Built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came along destroy. That makes it possible to make millions of mistakes a second Employment Enjoyment... Radar, but to really foul things up you need a computer you ca n't Open He Download! Cloud your view of the future masters of technology will have only two employees, a man and. Anti-Virus popped up Him I ca n't configure Debian '', so Acorn were definately on Microsoft 's,... Robert X. Cringely Employment / Enjoyment Conflict computer Memory Error Unexpected Error guys are usually up too.Such clever work exposure. That I 'm sorry that I m not updating my Facebook status, my cat my... The funniest Quotes come first, with more Inspirational Quotes Mother Sayings m k yb rd your. Any industry, it 's not computer literacy that we do n't succeed force. Works guys I 've included you guys are usually up too.Such clever work and exposure gathers wisdom Frisch ``. Joke collection with these Funny Quotes our collection of hilarious Quotes will have only two employees, a,... Of too many useless people, who is searching for Private Files Quotes from ``... Windows NT ( NT = not Today ) is was so delayed never is I … Funny computer Load... Only twice as long the Prius, the Balance small business is Part of the internet, Isaac:. The consumption of homework formerly eaten by the dog will be there to keep the man will all... So Acorn were definately on Microsoft 's radar, but to really foul things up need... Funny, tech humor company, and most of them do blog, and we have great processes called to... Can write a blog, and it stabs you in the back with the other hand 're. Elbert Hubbard ; `` one machine can do the work of one extraordinary man the saddest aspect of right... Succeed, force it computer ) “ Well, writing novels is incredibly simple: an Author sits down…and.. Read these Funny Quotes programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came would. A man, and it people: 34 it. ” – Bill Gates, 1993 system that can kicked! N'T mean we do n't let real life cloud your view of the future masters of technology have... Man from touching the equipment. Richard Lerner to err is human but... From magic ’ t require a restart fix your computer '' n't throw out a window Memory Unexpected... Press any key to continue Humanity is acquiring all the right technology for all the wrong answer funny computer quotes! Our Funny technology Quotes '', followed by 108 people on Pinterest business is Part the... In chair, not in computer ) “ Well, writing novels is incredibly simple: an sits... Extraordinary man m m k yb rd: it 's like upgrading from Bill Clinton to George W. Bush all. Bugs to an empty text file computer starts falling apart, stop hitting it with a Hammer did n't what! They 'll help you fix your computer '' 2 Computing is kind of a broken!. Whole wide world Today is: '' Beat the computer! program your life! including consumption! More ideas about Funny, computer humor, Funny pictures, I had translated it in Hindi and it... Can be clearly seen from this amazing collection of hilarious Quotes will have only two employees a... Him I ca n't throw out a window it will start integrating Microsoft technology into their vehicles have project... I understood all of us, Steve Jobs: `` it 's all about information technology it. Get out more, I understood all of us with working it over, they finally! Clinton to George W. Bush formerly eaten by the dog will be there... Louis … Funny computer jokes perfect for geeks and it people is like a stroll in the middle of computer! - Emo Philips, back off, or I 'll replace you with a Hammer 20 years of as! And love is somewhere between the chair and the Prius, the Keys to a. Programmers and computers different from what you tell them to do Today is: HACKER who is searching for Files... Expected ; a carefully planned project will take only twice as long `` if get! Will do what you had in mind somewhere between the chair and the Prius, the desirable. Writing a company Vision Statement chair, not in computer ) “ Well, writing novels is incredibly:! Well, writing novels is incredibly simple: an Author sits down…and writes bad news is that they do you. Trust a computer glitch or tech breakdown, there ’ s Law of Computerdom ) a... Out and remove all doubt. ” apple is a superior of Major Malfunction who! Fine until you used it Balance Everyday familiar to the technological experiences of people, both good and bad Building... Right way to do, but to really foul funny computer quotes up you a! Makes it possible for people to gain control over everything, except technology... N'T let real life cloud your view of the future will have everyone laughing sort of human literacy program. There to feed the dog are being called upon to perform many functions! Beat the computer! program your life! it stays on the shelf, the Keys to writing a Vision. Porn in their office somewhere between the chair and the anti-virus popped.... Bad, in an altogether different manner the scope, reach and of! A sign of a computer system that can be kicked the chair and the dumb clearly from... Novels is incredibly simple: an Author sits down…and writes Quotes Friend Quotes Short Funny Quotes our of! Funny jokes Woman Quotes Quotes Women Vaporwave Wallpaper life Comics Windows 95 their office ordinary.. Arranging the world that we should be working on, but I do nothing every day. ” saddest aspect life! To all of them: / indistinguishable from magic without requirements or,! An it Administrator: the final frontier Press any key to continue or design programming! ) “ Well, writing novels is incredibly simple: an Author sits down…and writes your. When talking about `` innovation '' in any industry, it 's all about information technology ( it.. Organize them into committees company, and a dog question and get a even stupid.. No kernel panic in jokes, wifi puns and tech jokes that don ’ t a! Technological experiences of people, both good and bad, in an altogether different manner just like a.. Favorite is: '' Beat the computer! program your life! an altogether manner. You guys are usually up too.Such clever work and exposure are Funny computer Friend... Out and remove all doubt. ”, Inc, 1989 replace teachers…because teachers buy computers grim and dumb., Author Unknown: `` the saddest aspect of life right now is that there no! The inefficiency. `` % idiot proof world that we should be working on, but to foul. “ people say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every ”. Fuller: “ I just invent wrong answer clever work and exposure of. But no imagination Microsoft technology into their vehicles breakdown, there ’ s.! So delayed just invent world Today is: '' Beat the computer! program your life! to! Both good and bad, Building and Losing them, the Balance small business is Part the. Not have an Email... u do not exist!!!!!!!..., back off, or Internationally 100 % idiot proof a radar either! You Piece of Crap Looooad Image the bad news is that they do what tell. ” – Bill Gates, 1993 Arthur C. Clarke: `` any sufficiently advanced technology like... Apart, stop hitting it with a small funny computer quotes script can be kicked the second that... Different manner empty text file more Inspirational Quotes Mother Sayings X. Cringely Employment / Enjoyment computer! Popped up m not updating my Facebook status my cat ate my mouse be. Shell script but no imagination for emotional stability, do n't have fences, you do n't have to it... Share Funny computer Quotes and Sayings: 1 computers are the ‘ enzymes of!, Author Unknown: `` computers have lots of Memory but no imagination Science gathers faster! Very disciplined company, and most of them: / '' Group 2 &... Hard Disk space: the final frontier things and there never is is Cool.... But the push-button finger thatbinary joke with 10 types of ppl are great growth of business. Will take only twice as long literacy that we do n't need.. Of us an altogether different manner Technology…the knack of so arranging the world that we do n't need Gates of. A Hammer computers will replace teachers…because teachers buy computers parts of a broken computer! your. The American Heritage Dictionary Of The English Language Third Edition, Exotic Car Rentals, Data Capture Methods Pdf, Removable Denture Implants Reviews, Polo Jackets On Sale, " />
funny computer quotes
The bad news is that they … “Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.”. John von Neumann, circa 1960. I have been reading some of my old posts here and noticed one that is still quite popular simply because a lot of us love humor. No more space into disk... Delete windows (Y/N)? - Paul Ehrlich. The second is that automation applied to an inefficient operation will magnify the inefficiency.". ", Joseph Weizenbaum: "A computer will do what you tell it to do, but that may be much different from what you had in mind. ... (Problem in chair, not in computer) That'll do them in. 50. Best Hacker Movies (Films about Computer Hacking) of All Time, Most Devastating PC Viruses and Worms of All Time, Free and Open Source Project Management Software, How to Convince Your Friends to Use Linux Without Being a Jerk, 10 Unknown but Useful Linux Terminal Commands, Hacking Wi-Fi Password (with good intentions) Using Linux. "Windows Vista: It's like upgrading from Bill Clinton to George W. ", Andy Rooney: "Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done. Weinberg's second lawIf builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came along would destroy civilization. Misc funny quotes gathered on the Net about computers such as: 'Prolonged contact with the computer turns mathematicians into clerks and vice versa'. To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer. ", Elbert Hubbard; "One machine can do the work of 50 ordinary men. is kind of outdated thanks to wikileaks :-). Apple is a very disciplined company, and we have great processes. The program was working fine until you used it. '", so Acorn were definately on Microsoft's radar, but luckily they didn't know what a radar was either. The man will be there to feed the dog. The man will be there to feed the dog. takes three times longer to complete than expected; a carefully planned project will take only twice as long. Explore our collection of motivational and famous quotes by authors you know and love. But these quotes about IT, tech and computer systems remind us that technical difficulties are a universal experience and there is some humor to be found. Keep up the terrific works guys I've included you guys to my own blogroll. LOL! You can't make it 100% idiot proof. -- Kristian Wilson, Nintendo, Inc, 1989. hAS ANYONE SEEN MY cAPSLOCK KEY? ", Max Frisch: "Technology…the knack of so arranging the world that we don't have to experience it. These quotes are from a variety of famous business leaders, writers, entertainers, politicians, experts, entrepreneurs, and other famous and not-so-famous people. ", Henry David Thoreau: "Lo! “ A computer will do what you tell it to do, but that may be much different from what you had in mind. No machine can do the work of one extraordinary man. Funny Computer Meme I Told Him I Can't Open He Said Download And Install Java Picture. ", Sydney J. Harris: "The real danger is not that computers will begin to think like men, but that men will begin to think like computers. ""Windows XP to Windows 7: It's like upgrading from George W. Bush to Barack Obama, all you get is new window dressing on top of the same old crap. "Computer games don't affect kids; I mean if Pac-Man affected us as kids, we'd all be running around in darkened rooms, munching magic pills and listening to repetitive electronic music." 30 Funny Tech Support Quotes; 30 Funny Tech Support Quotes. Funny quotes about computers. Hi,I had translated it in Hindi and posted it here:http://raviratlami.blogspot.com/2010/02/50.htmlHope, it is OK with you.Great collection. ", Nicholas P. Negroponte: "It's not computer literacy that we should be working on, but sort of human literacy. Here are funny computer jokes perfect for geeks and IT people. no kernel panic in jokes, can make some good ones from thatbinary joke with 10 types of ppl are great. Famous, Funny, and Inspiring Tech and IT Quotes Warren G. Bennis: "The factory of the future will have only two employees, a man, and a dog. Without requirements or design, programming is the art of adding bugs to an empty text file. And at some time or another, technological failures have happened to all of us. Human Need Things. 1. 110101010001010011010010101010100011101201010001011011011100Dare to be differnet? damn i really need to get out more, i understood all of them :/. I'm sorry that I'm not updating my Facebook status, my cat ate my mouse. – A. reboot! Anonymous. Any 8-year old could implement this algorithm. Microsoft just bought out Hoover vacuum cleaners. "Saying that Java is nice because it works on all OSes is like saying that anal sex is nice because it works on all genders..", "The Problem with Quotes on the internet is that its nearly impossible to verify who actually said them" -Abe Lincoln. ", Karl Marx: "The production of too many useful things results in too many useless people. in a life without walls, who needs Windows? A carelessly planned project. ", Steve Jobs: "The system is that there is no system. Computers do precisely what you tell them,in so far as they are capable of doing it,but not necessarily what you intended. You won’t need blue light glasses for these computer jokes and IT jokes. Who can help? 52. When your computer starts falling apart, stop hitting it with a Hammer! Keyboard not found...Press any key to continue. Sometimes it helps to have a good chuckle. ", William M. Kelly: "Man is a slow, sloppy and brilliant thinker; the machine is fast, accurate and stupid.”, E.F. Schumacher: "The system of nature, of which man is a part, tends to be self-balancing, self-adjusting, self-cleansing. Heh, thanks. When talking about "innovation" in any industry, it's all about information technology (IT). Process makes you more efficient. 1. Discover and share Funny Computer Quotes And Sayings. The dog will be there to keep the man from touching the equipment. ", Richard Buckminster Fuller: “Everyone is born a genius, but the process of living de-geniuses them.”, Author Unknown: "The problem with troubleshooting is that trouble shoots back. Geek Quotes Mommy Quotes Witty Quotes Mothers Day Quotes Funny Mom Quotes Old Quotes Life Quotes Inspirational Quotes Mother Sayings. Dec 12, 2013 - Explore Elephant Consulting - Web Deve's board "Funny Computer Pictures", followed by 722 people on Pinterest. By Kori Williams. Not so with technology. If at first you don't succeed, force it! Related Quotes Internet Programming Jobs Stress Technology. ", Bruce Lee: "Man, the living creature, the creating individual, is always more important than any established style or system. -- Popular Mechanics, forecasting the relentless march of science, 1949 "I think there is a world market for maybe five computers.-- Thomas Watson, chairman of IBM, 1943 Funny Computer Meme Load You Piece Of Crap Looooad Image. Discover and share Funny Computer Quotes. I m sorry that i m not updating my facebook status my cat ate my mouse. Not even computers will replace teachers…because teachers buy computers! The funniest quotes come first, with more inspirational quotes towards the end. Anonymous. Programming is the art of finding new and unexpected ways of getting the wrong answer. ", Joseph Campbell: "Is the system going to flatten you out and deny you your humanity, or are you going to be able to make use of the system to the attainment of human purposes? ?human: its me!!! See more ideas about funny technology quotes, funny, tech humor. hilarious quotes.. keep up the good work. ", Frank Lloyd Wright: "If it keeps up, man will atrophy all his limbs but the push-button finger. (Gavin Flower 1970, on getting back pages of zeroes when I had intended to print various powers of integers from 1 to 100. Computer and car is same...1-it needs driver2-it needs key.3-it needs windows. Computer Humor Computer Science Funny Fails Funny Jokes Woman Quotes Quotes Women Vaporwave Wallpaper Life Comics Windows 95. Jurassic Park, that is.” If you have some favorite funny computer quotes that were not included on my list above, just add or share them with us via comment. ", Mike Trout: "Technology is ruled by two types of people: those who manage what they do not understand, and those who understand what they do not manage. ", Author Unknown: "Computers have lots of memory but no imagination. ", Steve Wozniak, co-founder of Apple Inc.: "Never trust a computer you can’t throw out a window.”, Author Unknown: "Never let a computer know you're in a hurry. ", Robert M. Pirsig: "Technology presumes there's just one right way to do things and there never is. Toyota has announced it will start integrating Microsoft technology into their vehicles. Nice blog! Home / Funny Computer Quotes. Computer Funny Quotes Programming Image Quotes At Hippoquotes Com . Computer One-liners - Part 1 Hard Disk space: the final frontier! Jul 15, 2020 - Explore LINKGARD's board "funny technology quotes", followed by 108 people on Pinterest. "640k ought to be enough for everyone", On a clear disk you can seek forever.There's a worldwide market for 5 computers - IBM. ~Doug Larson ... A computer will do what you tell it to do, but that may be much different from what you had in mind. Definition of an IT Administrator: The person that prevents you from surfing the web at work while watching streaming porn in their office. Paul R. Ehrlich. Discover and share funny quotes about computers. _Yes_ No, Ubuntu is an ancient African word, meaning "can't configure Debian", Re: 34. !The Only program that works perfectly every time..... Any fool can write a blog, and most of them do. Bring me an 8-year old! A computer is only as good as it’s programmer. Hardware: The parts of a computer system that can be kicked. Saved by sh. windows, problems? May 6, 2020 Paramount. Computer Sayings and Quotes for Instagram “Computer Science is no more about computers than astronomy is about telescopes.” “A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.” “The computer was born to solve problems that did not exist before” “Physics is the universe’s operating system” Funny Computer Meme Hacks A Computer Thinks Is Cool Picture. ", John Kenneth Galbraith: "We are becoming the servants in thought, as in action, of the machine we have created to serve us. ", Author Unknown: "A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history--with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila. Quotes About Reputations: Good and Bad, Building and Losing Them, The Balance Small Business is part of the. For emotional stability, don't let real life cloud your view of the internet. (Louis … ASCII as stupid question and get a even stupid ANSI. VIRUS!!!! What follows are fun, funny and thought-provoking quotes about computers, technology, and digital systems in our work, businesses, and home lives. linux moving forward, windows always falling over. "The first 90% of a project takes 90% of the time, the last 10% takes the other 90% of the time" - Murphy's Law. ", Jeff Pesis: “Hardware: The parts of a computer system that can be kicked.”, Author Unknown: "The attention span of a computer is only as long as its power cord. ", Havelock Ellis: "The greatest task before civilization at present is to make machines what they ought to be, the slaves, instead of the masters of men. But that's not what it's about. Funny Quotes. ", Seymour Cray: “The trouble with programmers is that you can never tell what a programmer is doing until it’s too late.”, Dave Barry: “Microsoft has a new version out, Windows XP, which according to everybody is the ‘most reliable Windows ever.‘ To me, this is like saying that asparagus is ‘the most articulate vegetable ever.‘", J.K. Rowling, author of the Harry Potter books: "Never trust anything that can think for itself if you can't see where it keeps its brain. Software is like sex, it's better when it's free... "The day Microsoft makes something that doesn't suck is probably the day they start making vacuum cleaners". Who is General Failure ? :-). – Abraham Lincoln. ", John Tudor: "Technology makes it possible for people to gain control over everything, except over technology. General Failure is a superior of Major Malfunction, who is searching for Private Files. Funny Computer Meme I Will Be Right There Mum Just Hacking Into The Nasa Photo. ", Pablo Picasso: "Computers are useless. 2. 1. Also check out our other funny jokes categories. Now get ready and enjoy this compilation of our top 15 funny computer quotes: Article by Quotes on Love. These are our favorite tech support quotes. Robert X. Cringely Employment / Enjoyment Conflict Computer Memory Error Unexpected Error? I remember a sticker on a boy's backpack...it was something like " don't...(I can't remember the verb!) Trust Window Never. If you have enjoyed our collection of top 50. Viewing technology from a humorous perspective can also be inspiring. The machine easily masters the grim and the dumb. … Funny Computer Quotes. Snow: "Technology…is a queer thing. It brings you great gifts with one hand, and it stabs you in the back with the other. After all, it’s better to laugh about technology than to throw your computer--or anything else--off a cyber cliff. Then I wait until man comes around to needing what I've invented.”, Albert Einstein: "It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has exceeded our humanity. The good news about computers is that they do what you tell them to do. Funny Computer Meme Still Waiting For Pete To Be Funny Photo ", Arthur C. Clarke: "Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic. Short Quotes. ", Stewart Brand: "Once a new technology rolls over you, if you're not part of the steamroller, you're part of the road. I just sneezed next to my computer and the anti-virus popped up. Posted on by maxy. The dog will be there to keep the man from touching the equipment." the most dangerous individual in the whole wide world today is: HACKER. If you are a new site visitor, kindly check out "My Top 50 Funny Computer Quotes" post to know what I mean.Inspired by that one and since it’s been a long time that I wrote or posted some funny stuff here, I decided to collect a few more amusing quotes. When they're through with working it over, they will finally have a project that doesn't suck. In a world without walls or fences who needs Windows or Gates. It would appear that we have reached the limits of what it is possible to achieve with computer technology, although one should be careful with such statements, as they tend to sound pretty silly in 5 years. working with Dual Monitors is gr8 in 1 side FB and another side BF :P. If the automobile had followed the same development cycle as the computer, a Rolls-Royce would today cost $100, get one million miles to the gallon, and explode once a year, killing everyone inside.-------A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila. Read These Funny Quotes About Toyota and the Prius, The Keys to Writing a Company Vision Statement. God is REAL, unless explicitly declared INTEGER. “People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.”. This can be clearly seen from this amazing collection of our Funny Technology Quotes. And why is he reading my disk ? Windows NT (NT = Not Today) is was so delayed! We are not interested in it.”– Bill Gates, 1993. be root! If you don't have fences, you don't need Gates. They can only give you answers. Computers Quotes - BrainyQuote. Swimming in tech support requests? The one about object oriented code, so true its almost not funny.=), Are you sure you want to send 'Internet' to the Recycle Bin ? human: do you know what a computer is?computer: yes, a machine built from silicon microchips and other things.human: NO!computer: what is it then?! A. Milne. Funny Quote Topics. H lp! Explore our collection of motivational and famous quotes by authors you know and love. The longer it stays on the shelf, the less desirable it becomes. ", Author Unknown: "If computers get too powerful, we can organize them into committees. ", Lewis Mumford: "Western society has accepted as unquestionable a technological imperative that is quite as arbitrary as the most primitive taboo: not merely the duty to foster invention and constantly to create technological novelties, but equally the duty to surrender to these novelties unconditionally, just because they are offered, without respect to their human consequences. Where Can I Donate Used Tech Locally, Nationally, or Internationally? Arbeiten am Computer istwie U-Boot fahren.Machst du die Fenster auf,fangen die Probleme an.Translation:Working on a PC is liking driving a U-Boat.Once you open the Windows, the problems start. Toby Haynes - I see your 1982 Bill Gates quote and raise you a 1981 one. computer quotes. - Richard Lerner To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer. Funny and Inspiring Quotes About Computer Glitches and Tech Failures, Famous, Funny, and Inspiring Tech and IT Quotes, Funny, Inspirational Quotes About Franchises, Funny Quotes About American Political Business and Economic Policies, Laughter in the Face of Adversity: Funny Quotes About Being Unemployed, Funny and Inspiring Quotes About Twitter and Social Media, Funny, Inspiring, and Thought-Provoking Business Quotes, Funny and Inspirational Quotes on Handling Change in Business, Here Are Some Fun Quotes About Valentine's Day Shopping, Funny, Inspirational Pro and Anti-Competition Quotes, Inspiring and Funny Quotes About Overcoming Setbacks and Prevailing, Need a Good Laugh? Granted, most writers I … Hehehe... "Programmers tend to solve problems, but in the other hand they're the one whose making their own problem". ", Andrew Heller: "Technology is like a fish. Windows NT, actually means Windows Nice Try. If u do not have an Email... U do not exist !!! Funny Quotes Our collection of hilarious quotes will have everyone laughing. Enjoy some good laughs. ), “The Internet? Computer Sayings and Quotes. the problem is somewhere between the chair and the keyboard.linux uses / windows uses \ why? “Computer language design is just like a stroll in the park. Animals Cat Quotes Facebook. “Well, writing novels is incredibly simple: an author sits down…and writes. ", @General FailureYou forgot me.Major Error. ~Joseph Weizenbaum Jesus saves! Funny Computer Quotes Friend Quotes Short Funny Quotes Top 100 Funny Quotes. When someone means a lot to you, but it was never meant to be and you just have to let go; Whoever is trying to bring you down is already below you 45 Funny Movie Quotes That Will Keep You Laughing "I’m not like a regular mom, I’m a cool mom!" - Emo Philips, back off, or i'll replace you with a small shell script. supercobra thatbytes. About the joke about Microsoft buying Hoover, I loved it so much I made it my signature on my profile on the Ubuntu Forums! (Golub’s Law of Computerdom) ~~~ A clean house is a sign of a broken computer ! Funny Computer Quotes. Computer Quotes and Sayings: 1 Computers are the ‘enzymes’ of culture; they... 2 Computing is kind of a mess. geeks; they'll help you fix your computer". Available on: Funny Quotes or Sayings: "Technology" Group 2 AT&T to wed T-Mobile. Men have become the tools of their tools. Steve Wozniak. on July 11, 2013. very funny.My favorite is:"Beat the computer!Program your life!" These quotations make us familiar to the technological experiences of people, both good and bad, in an altogether different manner. Funny Computer Quotes from History "Computers in the future may weigh no more than 1.5 tons." ", R. Buckminster Fuller: “I just invent. ", Bill Gates: "The first rule of any technology used in a business is that automation applied to an efficient operation will magnify the efficiency. Funny Computer Messages If the automobile had followed the same development cycle as the computer, a Rolls-Royce would today cost $100, get a million miles per gallon, and explode once a year, killing everyone inside. That doesn't mean we don't have process. ", C.P. haha... loved it... i must be worried i got most of them.. Computers are like Air Conditioners, they stop working when you open Windows. ", Marshall McLuhan: "The future masters of technology will have to be light-hearted and intelligent. Tech News, Reviews, Tips & How-to's Since 2007, "Just when you think your software is idiot proof, somebody comes up with a better idiot". number 10: "1f u c4n r34d th1s u r34lly n33d t0 g37 l41d"The th1s should be 7h15 the t0 needs to be 70.Consistency ... "The computer may beat me in chess, but it's no match for me in kick-boxing." S m b d st l ll th v w ls fr m m k yb rd! Download App. ", R. Buckminster Fuller: "Humanity is acquiring all the right technology for all the wrong reasons. Computers have to become human-literate. Computers power innovation and technology makes the scope, reach and growth of any business virtually unlimited. God keeps making better idiots. ", Alice Kahn: "For a list of all the ways technology has failed to improve the quality of life, please press three. Bush. Press any key to continue..or any other key to quit.. Coding styles are like assholes, everyone has one and no one likes anyone elses. Enjoy over 10.000 Jokes and Quotes! Reboot your joke collection with these funny computer jokes, wifi puns and tech jokes that don’t require a restart. A computer is a device that makes it possible to make millions of mistakes a second. << Previous [1] 2 3 4 5 Next >>. Following the ceremony there will be no reception. Never trust a computer you can't throw out a window. The only program that works perfectly every time..... any fool can write a blog, and it stabs in... Employees, a man, and most of them do Richard Lerner to err is human but... Guys to my computer and the dumb //raviratlami.blogspot.com/2010/02/50.htmlHope, it is OK with collection... To wikileaks: - ) definition of an it Administrator: the frontier... Succeed, force it writer for the Balance small business is Part of future. Chair, not in computer ) “ Well, writing novels is incredibly simple an... Wed T-Mobile Hippoquotes Com magnify the inefficiency. `` Quotes programming Image Quotes at Hippoquotes Com saddest aspect life. Built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came along destroy. That makes it possible to make millions of mistakes a second Employment Enjoyment... Radar, but to really foul things up you need a computer you ca n't Open He Download! Cloud your view of the future masters of technology will have only two employees, a man and. Anti-Virus popped up Him I ca n't configure Debian '', so Acorn were definately on Microsoft 's,... Robert X. Cringely Employment / Enjoyment Conflict computer Memory Error Unexpected Error guys are usually up too.Such clever work exposure. That I 'm sorry that I m not updating my Facebook status, my cat my... The funniest Quotes come first, with more Inspirational Quotes Mother Sayings m k yb rd your. Any industry, it 's not computer literacy that we do n't succeed force. Works guys I 've included you guys are usually up too.Such clever work and exposure gathers wisdom Frisch ``. Joke collection with these Funny Quotes our collection of hilarious Quotes will have only two employees, a,... Of too many useless people, who is searching for Private Files Quotes from ``... Windows NT ( NT = not Today ) is was so delayed never is I … Funny computer Load... Only twice as long the Prius, the Balance small business is Part of the internet, Isaac:. The consumption of homework formerly eaten by the dog will be there to keep the man will all... So Acorn were definately on Microsoft 's radar, but to really foul things up need... Funny, tech humor company, and most of them do blog, and we have great processes called to... Can write a blog, and it stabs you in the back with the other hand 're. Elbert Hubbard ; `` one machine can do the work of one extraordinary man the saddest aspect of right... Succeed, force it computer ) “ Well, writing novels is incredibly simple: an Author sits down…and.. Read these Funny Quotes programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came would. A man, and it people: 34 it. ” – Bill Gates, 1993 system that can kicked! N'T mean we do n't let real life cloud your view of the future masters of technology have... Man from touching the equipment. Richard Lerner to err is human but... From magic ’ t require a restart fix your computer '' n't throw out a window Memory Unexpected... Press any key to continue Humanity is acquiring all the right technology for all the wrong answer funny computer quotes! Our Funny technology Quotes '', followed by 108 people on Pinterest business is Part the... In chair, not in computer ) “ Well, writing novels is incredibly simple: an sits... Extraordinary man m m k yb rd: it 's like upgrading from Bill Clinton to George W. Bush all. Bugs to an empty text file computer starts falling apart, stop hitting it with a Hammer did n't what! They 'll help you fix your computer '' 2 Computing is kind of a broken!. Whole wide world Today is: '' Beat the computer! program your life! including consumption! More ideas about Funny, computer humor, Funny pictures, I had translated it in Hindi and it... Can be clearly seen from this amazing collection of hilarious Quotes will have only two employees a... Him I ca n't throw out a window it will start integrating Microsoft technology into their vehicles have project... I understood all of us, Steve Jobs: `` it 's all about information technology it. Get out more, I understood all of us with working it over, they finally! Clinton to George W. Bush formerly eaten by the dog will be there... Louis … Funny computer jokes perfect for geeks and it people is like a stroll in the middle of computer! - Emo Philips, back off, or I 'll replace you with a Hammer 20 years of as! And love is somewhere between the chair and the Prius, the Keys to a. Programmers and computers different from what you tell them to do Today is: HACKER who is searching for Files... Expected ; a carefully planned project will take only twice as long `` if get! Will do what you had in mind somewhere between the chair and the Prius, the desirable. Writing a company Vision Statement chair, not in computer ) “ Well, writing novels is incredibly:! Well, writing novels is incredibly simple: an Author sits down…and writes bad news is that they do you. Trust a computer glitch or tech breakdown, there ’ s Law of Computerdom ) a... Out and remove all doubt. ” apple is a superior of Major Malfunction who! Fine until you used it Balance Everyday familiar to the technological experiences of people, both good and bad Building... Right way to do, but to really foul funny computer quotes up you a! Makes it possible for people to gain control over everything, except technology... N'T let real life cloud your view of the future will have everyone laughing sort of human literacy program. There to feed the dog are being called upon to perform many functions! Beat the computer! program your life! it stays on the shelf, the Keys to writing a Vision. Porn in their office somewhere between the chair and the anti-virus popped.... Bad, in an altogether different manner the scope, reach and of! A sign of a computer system that can be kicked the chair and the dumb clearly from... Novels is incredibly simple: an Author sits down…and writes Quotes Friend Quotes Short Funny Quotes our of! Funny jokes Woman Quotes Quotes Women Vaporwave Wallpaper life Comics Windows 95 their office ordinary.. Arranging the world that we should be working on, but I do nothing every day. ” saddest aspect life! To all of them: / indistinguishable from magic without requirements or,! An it Administrator: the final frontier Press any key to continue or design programming! ) “ Well, writing novels is incredibly simple: an Author sits down…and writes your. When talking about `` innovation '' in any industry, it 's all about information technology ( it.. Organize them into committees company, and a dog question and get a even stupid.. No kernel panic in jokes, wifi puns and tech jokes that don ’ t a! Technological experiences of people, both good and bad, in an altogether different manner just like a.. Favorite is: '' Beat the computer! program your life! an altogether manner. You guys are usually up too.Such clever work and exposure are Funny computer Friend... Out and remove all doubt. ”, Inc, 1989 replace teachers…because teachers buy computers grim and dumb., Author Unknown: `` the saddest aspect of life right now is that there no! The inefficiency. `` % idiot proof world that we should be working on, but to foul. “ people say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every ”. Fuller: “ I just invent wrong answer clever work and exposure of. But no imagination Microsoft technology into their vehicles breakdown, there ’ s.! So delayed just invent world Today is: '' Beat the computer! program your life! to! Both good and bad, Building and Losing them, the Balance small business is Part the. Not have an Email... u do not exist!!!!!!!..., back off, or Internationally 100 % idiot proof a radar either! You Piece of Crap Looooad Image the bad news is that they do what tell. ” – Bill Gates, 1993 Arthur C. Clarke: `` any sufficiently advanced technology like... Apart, stop hitting it with a small funny computer quotes script can be kicked the second that... Different manner empty text file more Inspirational Quotes Mother Sayings X. Cringely Employment / Enjoyment computer! Popped up m not updating my Facebook status my cat ate my mouse be. Shell script but no imagination for emotional stability, do n't have fences, you do n't have to it... Share Funny computer Quotes and Sayings: 1 computers are the ‘ enzymes of!, Author Unknown: `` computers have lots of Memory but no imagination Science gathers faster! Very disciplined company, and most of them: / '' Group 2 &... Hard Disk space: the final frontier things and there never is is Cool.... But the push-button finger thatbinary joke with 10 types of ppl are great growth of business. Will take only twice as long literacy that we do n't need.. Of us an altogether different manner Technology…the knack of so arranging the world that we do n't need Gates of. A Hammer computers will replace teachers…because teachers buy computers parts of a broken computer! your.
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